An Awful Tangled Mess
by skywings1416
Summary: What happens when you add a first fight, a suspected affair, a drunken husband, and meddling in-laws? You get an awful tangled mess. Can Rapunzel and Eugene kiss and make up? Or is this the end of their happily ever after. Rated M for cussing, drunken, surly behavior, and sex.
1. Chapter 1

Scene One: Ignition

Eugene let out a long, exasperated breath. Rapunzel could be so demanding sometimes. This was not how he wanted to spend their only free hour together. He wanted to actually do something, not be her toy to use as she wished. Lately he'd been feeling like an object to Rapunzel, only there to fill her desires. He was tired of only being a model for her to paint.

"Eugene! I told you not to move!"

"You've had me standing like this for the better part of an hour! My arm is tired and I feel ridiculous!"

Actually, Eugene _looked_ ridiculous. He really was being used to fulfill Rapunzel's desires, as odd as they might be. Earlier that day, after the conference she had had to attend with her father, Rapunzel had sought out Eugene with one artistically daring idea in her head; paint Eugene standing heroically, shirtless and holding her famous frying pan. This idea had actually been implanted in her head by a dream she had had the night before in which Eugene had ridden up to her tower on Maximus to rescue her. (Actually, Eugene had been wearing less, but Rapunzel didn't want to paint quite _that_ much.)

"If you'll just be still a bit longer, I'm working on your nose right now."

"Whatever," Eugene grumbled. Rapunzel barely heard how irritated Eugene sounded. She'd been doing that lately, not paying attention to him. He was trying not to let it get under his skin. "Where'd you even come up with this idea?" Rapunzel blushed and almost dropped her paint brush.

"Ah, well, um, you know, books…. heheh." (Rapunzel was actually too embarrassed to tell Eugene about her dream, cause then she'd be forced to tell the whole dream, and some things happened that just shouldn't be spoken aloud) She tried to change the subject.

"I think it's going to be a nice picture. I was going to hang it above the mantel."

"I don't want this picture hanging above a mantel!"

"I was talking about above our mantel."

"I said I don't want to see this picture above a mantel!"

"Stop being difficult! I want to see it!"

"Then put it in your closet!"

"What is your problem, Eugene?" Rapunzel threw her paintbrush down and stormed up to her husband. "Why are you being so… irritating? All I'm doing is painting a picture of you! Is that so bad?" Eugene broke his pose and crossed his arms, barring down at his wife.

"I don't know, maybe not. This is the only time all week you've looked at me this long."

"What?" Rapunzel took a step back. She felt like she'd been slapped across the face and punched in the stomach.

"Oh, don't tell me you haven't noticed. Try to recall, Blondie, the last time you and I saw each other and spent time together."

"Eugene, you're being ridiculous. We've seen each other this whole week."

"Besides waking up in the morning and going to bed."

"Eh, well, we… we had lunch…. didn't we?" Eugene narrowed his eyes at her. She squirmed a bit. Rapunzel looked away, quickly trying to recall the last time she'd spent more than ten minutes with Eugene. Monday, she had to sit in the throne room with her parents listening to requests from the people. Had she seen Eugene that day? What about Tuesday? She had riding lessons and Eugene was in his own lesson, so, no. Wednesday, surely she saw him Wednesday. No, she hadn't. She'd been in a dress fitting the whole day. Thursday, Rapunzel had not had any lessons, but her father had taken Eugene to survey the countryside. They'd been gone all day.

"See, you have been too busy all week to even think about your husband."

"Well if you gave me time, I wasn't done thinking! Just give me enough time to think!" Friday. They'd spent Friday together. "We were together all of Friday."

"We were at the orphanage the whole day, so it wasn't just the two of us."

"Uh… well."

"Rapunzel, today has been the only day in _weeks_ you and I have had a moment to ourselves. You've even been too tired for sex at night and I figured you would have wanted to at least do _that_, than paint some stupid picture!" Eugene gestured angrily to the canvas on the easel. Eugene pressed his hands into his eyes. He suddenly looked so tired. Rapunzel outstretched a hand towards him, but he moved away and her hand fell short. He sighed, removing his hands from his eyes and looked down at Rapunzel. She didn't like the look he gave her. "You know, Rapunzel, I consider our time together precious and it would be nice if you thought that too."


	2. Chapter 2

Scene Two: Third Party

The queen hurried down the hall as quickly as she could (queens can only hurry so quickly). Rapunzel was late. She knew that her daughter and Eugene hadn't spent much time together this week, but Rapunzel absolutely had to be at the tea party she'd planned. The other ladies were expecting her to be there and when a princess is expected, she is expected.

The queen hoped that Rapunzel wasn't going to ask her to tell the ladies that she had unfortunately become unwell and could not attend the tea party. She would not blame her if she did, though. It was very well known among the castle that Rapunzel and Eugene hadn't spent much more than ten minutes together for the last few weeks. Today was the first time in almost a month that the two had an hour to do whatever they wanted.

"And you don't think that I think our time together is precious!"

_Was that Rapunzel,_ the queen thought. Why was she yelling?

"Well, if it was, you'd be ordering for some more free time. You are a princess for crying out loud!"

_Oh, my, are Rapunzel and Eugene….fighting?_ The queen moved slowly to the door. She actually didn't need to get that close to hear everything; she was concerned the whole castle could hear them arguing.

"Yeah, I'm a princess and I've got stuff to do. I've missed nineteen years of it!"

"You don't think I know that? I knew what I was getting into when I married you."

"What is that supposed to mean!"

"IT MEANS THAT I'M FED UP WITH EVERYTHING IN THIS GOD DAMN FUCKING CASTLE!"

The queen did not notice her hands fly up to her mouth to keep herself from gasping in shock. Her heart was beating quickly, her ears rang with Eugene's words. Never once had she ever heard him speak so vulgarly and to Rapunzel especially. In fact, no one had ever heard Eugene raise his voice in the manner the queen had just witnessed. It was only after she noticed the sound of her heart did the queen realize that it was silent in Rapunzel and Eugene's room. The queen suddenly felt bad for her daughter and for Eugene; she felt partially responsible, considering she was in charge of her daughter's schedule. Maybe she had put too much responsibility on Rapunzel of late. But that was the least of her problems right now. She needed to do something, which was one of two things: either intrude upon the young couple, enabling them to cool off or just leave and let them talk it out, because the yelling match seemed to be finished.

"Why don't we just have sex if that's what you want?" The queen's face grew hot.

_Did my daughter just say that?_

"We are not having make up sex!" The queen wished she wasn't over hearing this argument.

_I should not be here listening to this._

"Wait, that's a thing!" The queen really wished she wasn't over hearing this argument. "Eugene stop it! Take your shirt off!"

"I am not taking my shirt off; I just got it back on!"

"Take it off, right now!" The queen heard crashing and the two's voices mixing together as they struggled around the room.

_Oh, I should really just leave at this point._ The queen tried to tip toe away, but suddenly, the door was flung open, almost hitting her has it banged harshly against the wall. She jumped back and tried desperately to blend in with the wall.

"You know something, Rapunzel, sometimes I wish I hadn't married a princess!" Eugene stormed off down the hall, tucking his shirt in as he went and buckling up his vest. Rapunzel ran out of the room.

"Well maybe I wish I hadn't married a man whose nose is so hard to get right!"

Rapunzel's back was to her mother. The queen started to inch away, but she failed to take note of the vase that she had been standing by. She bumped into it and yelped as she caught it.

"Mother?"

_Someone, please save me._ The queen turned around slowly.

"Hello, dear."

"Mother, did you, did you hear all that?" Rapunzel's eyes were wide with fear and embarrassment.

"Hear what?" the queen lied. "I only came here to take you to afternoon tea."

"Was that today!" Rapunzel slapped her palms against her cheeks and raced back into the room. "I completely forgot! And I'm a mess!"

As the queen wandered into her room to wait for her daughter she thought that something else was a mess too.


	3. Chapter 3

Scene Three: An Uncomfortable Tea

Queen Isabelle wished her daughter would stop sighing into her tea.

Rapunzel was running Eugene's words and hers in her head. She could not make sense of it, no matter how hard she tried. She had no idea why Eugene had gotten so angry. She didn't even know what he meant when he said he was tired of everything. Tired of what? Tired of marriage? He had said he wished he'd never married a princess. Did that mean he wished he'd never married her?

Was he just angry because they hadn't had sex in awhile? She had been warned that some men get irritable if they aren't 'taken care of', but she was frustrated too. After almost a whole year of sex, Rapunzel liked it, but had been too tired in the last few weeks to do it. Or was he just upset they hadn't been together in awhile. He had made a big point of that.

Rapunzel sighed into her cup, uninterested in drinking the tea. She didn't like being mad at Eugene. It made her stomach knot up.

She didn't mean what she said to him, about his nose. She liked his nose and it wasn't that hard to draw. Maybe she'd pushed him too far by forcing him to pose for a picture he didn't want to. Was she being inconsiderate of him lately? She wasn't ignoring him, she was just busy. He had to understand at least that.

Rapunzel was so lost in her thoughts, she did not realize she was being spoken to until her mother nudged her in the ribs.

"Hm?"

"I asked, Princess, how your husband is."

"Eugene?" She found she barely recognized the name. Rapunzel acted quickly to gather herself. "He's fine. As healthy as…a horse." Rapunzel didn't know what she saying.

"He certainly looks healthy," tittered one of the older ladies. "He's a quite a handsome catch. I wouldn't mind waking up to a face like his every morning."

"Oh, Lady Osborne," scolded the company. Rapunzel smiled, not comfortable that the ladies were talking about _her_ husband in such a manner.

"By the way," continued Lady Osborne. Just how did you get such a fine man as Eugene, Princess?"

"I hit him over the head with a frying pan." The ladies chortled behind their hands, clearly thinking Rapunzel was joking.

"Oh, I know Eugene is a former thief, but he does so much good for the people of the kingdom." Rapunzel popped her head up. "I think it's simply wonderful how he goes around the village, looking for anyone to help. You know, he takes time to play with the children at the orphanage. He's so caring and considerate of others. Even though I'm sure," said the lady, "that he would rather be spending time with you, Princess."

"Yes, it certainly is a wonder how he turned himself around. I still remember how he would cause such problems throughout the kingdom."

"You must be very proud of your husband, Princess." Rapunzel nodded her head. It was all she could do; she found she'd lost her voice.

_Is that what Eugene does when he's not with me?_ Or maybe, Eugene would rather spend his time out of the palace, with people he was used to. Rapunzel knew he didn't like dealing with all the dignitaries and nobles that frequented the palace. They put him on edge.

Rapunzel drained her tea cup and set the saucer on the table.

"Mother," she said, turning to the queen, "I just remembered I have something imperative that must be done right away. If you will excuse me." Rapunzel stood up, curtsied to the ladies and left before her mother could even protest. But the queen wasn't going to; she had a pretty good idea about what Rapunzel was heading off to do.

As Rapunzel closed the door, she realized she had an awful taste in her mouth, and it wasn't from the tea.


	4. Chapter 4

Scene Four: How Do You Say I'm sorry?

Eugene liked being outside better than anywhere else. Inside of any building was too stuffy, too cramped. Fresh air was the only thing he let himself get addicted to, but today, Eugene wished he was under a rock.

He'd yelled at Rapunzel. Yelled at her. His wife! The woman he loved. He yelled at her. He still meant everything he said, but hindsight made him realize he could have said it with better tact.

"I guess all those stupid etiquette lessons did absolutely nothing," he muttered to himself.

Eugene was moping around the village, saying friendly hellos to the people he knew. They all asked where the princess was and how she was this fine day.

_Always _the princess, Eugene thought solemnly. Couldn't she just be Rapunzel?

He faked his way through mostly, smiling his cocky grin, breezing through answers. Being a thief had made him a pretty good liar. He said she was fine and that she was attending to royal duties. All the villagers asked if he would give their regards to their beloved princess. Eugene promised he would.

As he was coming back around to go back to the palace, Eugene was stopped by the florist.

"Fine day we're having, isn't it, Eugene," she said.

"Oh, yes," he replied, not really caring if the day was nice, because he'd ruined his. "Perfect day to be outside, alone with your thoughts."

"Heh, yeah, contemplate the day." The florist was putting together a bouquet of flowers. As she looked at Eugene, she saw his face slip into a frown. "Is everything alright, Eugene?"

"Hm? Oh, yes, everything is perfectly. Yep, couldn't be happier." The florist cocked an eyebrow, but didn't press the point. She picked up the flowers she'd just put together.

"Here, a little something to make your day even brighter."

"Oh, no, I don't need flowers," Eugene started. The florist insisted.

"Just take them. You could give them to your wife as a just because gift." Eugene looked at the flowers. Most men did apologize with flowers. He took them, smiling sheepishly.

"Thank you. I think she actually will like them."

"You're welcome, Eugene. Have a nice day." The flower girl waved him off. Eugene looked down at the flowers and sighed.

Eugene needed to apologize and explain himself to Rapunzel, and the idea left him feeling weak in the knees.


	5. Chapter 5

Scene Five: Flirting

Rapunzel's mind was made up. She wasn't quite sure what she'd done wrong, but she was going to apologize to Eugene and give him make up sex, whatever that was. She wondered if it was different from regular sex. She still could not believe there was such a thing, actually.

She'd spent the better part of two hours going up and down the halls looking for Eugene. It was just starting to get into evening time and she'd looked in all his favorite places: the library, the stables, the kitchen, the training yard. She checked their bedroom multiple times, but she could not find Eugene anywhere. She began to debate whether or not she should go looking in the village when she turned a corner and saw Eugene.

She ducked back behind the corner and peered around it, not wanting to believe what she was seeing.

Eugene was talking with another woman!

She a pretty, fair skinned girl, dressed as a palace maid, and she was much more well built and buxom than Rapunzel. She had large, dark blue eyes and pale blonde hair. Her smiles were gorgeous and her hands moved gracefully as she used them to talk. Eugene was smiling at her, obviously enjoying her company.

_Who is that woman and why is my husband talking with her?_

Rapunzel wanted to get closer; she could only hear the mumblings of what was being said, but if she moved from behind the corner, she'd be spotted.

_Why am I hiding from Eugene?_ She didn't have an answer for herself.

Rapunzel watched the two, wishing she'd never stumbled on them at all.

The way they were looking at each other, they knew each other; Rapunzel saw it. Those were not expressions of a random encounter with a friendly conversation. Those were faces of two people with history. The two were laughing, smiling. The maid put her hand on Eugene's arm; he didn't look like he minded. Eugene said something to make the woman giggle. Suddenly, Eugene smoldered, pouting his lips out, squinting his eyes and cocking his brows. The woman covered her mouth to hide her snort.

_That's…that's my face…he only makes that face for me…_ Rapunzel almost wanted to cry. She could feel her heart shattering and breaking off to sink to the bottom of her stomach.

Eugene said something very quietly. His face was soft and gentle. The maid blushed and her eyes darted to the floor. She put a hand to her face. She whispered something back. Eugene bent down and took her chin in his hand, bringing her eyes up to look at him.

_No…no…no, I'm not seeing this…I'm not seeing this._ Rapunzel bit back tears, sure her eyes were lying to her.

Eugene said something to her again. The maid beamed. She took Eugene's hand and held it in hers. Her mouth moved again with words and Eugene chuckled. She let go of his hand and Eugene brought up a bouquet of flowers Rapunzel hadn't noticed before. He took a flower from it and put it behind the maid's ear. His hand trailed down her face and his lips barely moved as he whispered something to her. The maid's eyes widened and without warning, she threw her arms around Eugene's neck. He hugged her back and her mouth said the words 'I love you.' The maid pulled away and kissed Eugene on the cheek.

Rapunzel held her pained scream in. She shook with confusion. She forced her eyes to stay on the two; it could not be true, Eugene could not be having an affair. He would never to that to her, not after what they'd been through to be together. He just couldn't.

Suddenly, the maid said good-bye to Eugene and dashed off down the hall. Eugene waved to her. He turned to right where Rapunzel was hiding. She panicked and frantically looked for a new hiding spot. She saw a door. She ran to it, praying it was unlocked. It was. She pulled it open and slammed it shut, and just in time. She heard Eugene's heavy boots walk by. She let out a sigh of relief.

"Rapunzel?" She jumped. Someone was in the room with her. She had not checked to see if anyone was there in the first place. She pivoted around. He father was looking at her, concerned. He was in a meeting with his councilors and an ambassador from a nearby kingdom.

"Hi, Daddy. I'll just be going now." Rapunzel opened the door and slipped out, giggling nervously as she left. The king's guests turned to him. He smiled.

"My daughter. She must be playing hide'n'seek with her husband. It's one of their favorite pastimes."


	6. Chapter 6

Scene Six: Just Missed

Eugene had searched the castle four times looking for Rapunzel. He'd gone to their rooms first, leaving the flowers. He could not find her anywhere. It was now late in the evening and he was beginning to worry. When he asked the servants, they all said they had not seen her. He went back to the bedroom, started a fire and sat down with a book. He decided to just wait for her to come to bed. She would have to get tired eventually.

Eugene could barely focus on the book. He kept looking up at the door every five minutes, expecting his wife to walk through at any moment. The longer he waited, the more agitated he became.

He was desperate to apologize to Rapunzel. He was sure she was mad at him and he wanted to make it up to her, not to get himself out of hot water, but because he felt so bad. He would do anything for her, pose for any stupid picture she dreamed up or anything else she deemed as a worthy apology. He would even let her hang the frying pan portrait above any mantle she wanted to prove how sorry he was.

An hour ticked by and there was still no Rapunzel.

Eugene closed his book and got up to go look for her again. As he reached the door, there was a knock on the other side. Eugene opened it to find his guard friend, Gerald, standing there out of uniform.

"Evening, Eugene."

"Oh, hi, Gerald," Eugene said, deflated. He walked away from the door, his shoulders slumping.

"Wow, what a reception. I didn't realize my presence was so…disheartening." Gerald always spoke frankly when he wasn't on duty, especially around Eugene.

"No, it's not that, it's just…" Eugene trailed off. "It's nothing. Never mind."

"Uh-huh. Where's Rapunzel?" Gerald looked around the room, stepping into it.

"I don't- eh, probably caught up in some meeting."

"Geez, she's being worked to the bone lately. She must be tired all the time."

"Yeah, she is," Eugene mumbled. He sat back down in his chair and stared into the fire.

"Well, if she's busy, you want to get out of the palace for a few hours? I've got the night off and I feel like a drink and it's no fun to drink without a friend."

"I don't know, Gerald. I'm sort of waiting for Rapunzel. There's something I want to talk to her about."

"Leave her a note. If she's in a meeting, it could take hours. Just because you're married, doesn't mean you can't have fun with your friends. There will be plenty of time to talk to her later, right?"

"Eh…" Eugene did not want to explain why he wanted to talk to Rapunzel. That was the last thing he needed to be spread around; he'd yelled at the princess. Her father would kill him for sure. "Well…" Eugene actually didn't know if Rapunzel _was_ in a meeting. He'd seen her that afternoon and not since. He had no idea what her schedule was for the rest of the day, except that it didn't involve him. "I guess…it wouldn't hurt. My throat has been a little dry. Just let me write the note." Eugene crossed the room to a writing desk and pulled out a pad of paper. He took a quill and wrote three short sentences.

_ I know this is an informal way of saying I'm sorry, but I'm sorry. I'll say it better later. _

_ I love you._

_ Eugene_

Eugene took the note and put it in an envelope and signed Rapunzel's name to it. He brought it to the table where he'd left the flowers.

"Alright. I guess we can go," Eugene sighed.

"Great. By the way, do you know of any good watering holes? Cause all the ones in the village aren't that great, I'm sorry to say."

"Actually, I do."

"Oh, where is it?"

"Oh, don't worry. You'll know it when you smell it."


	7. Chapter 7

Scene Seven: Apology Not Accepted

Rapunzel had stayed hidden in the library. Three times, she saw Eugene come in and she had a hard time keeping away from him, dodging behind the bookcases. She even had to resort to climbing atop the shelves to hide. She almost got caught that time. However, she eventually decided she couldn't avoid him forever. They were married after all and she thought she needed to have an actual discussion with him.

It must have been a misunderstanding, what she'd seen that afternoon. She knew Eugene; he would never, ever do anything to hurt her, or jeopardize the life they'd made together. Eugene was just a people person. He could be friendly with anyone and all the women in the palace had a little crush on him (afternoon tea had proven that). Rapunzel was willing to except any answer Eugene gave her because she knew it would be the truth and she loved him and knew him. He would never lie to her.

When Rapunzel came to the doors of their bedroom, she almost turned around. All her bravery was gone and was replaced with the fear of her suspicions. She didn't want them to be true and a little voice built a fire of doubt in her heart.

She had to face the situation, no matter the outcome. She and Eugene were a loving couple and they could get past anything. They just needed to discuss what had happened that afternoon. Rapunzel took a deep breath and opened the door.

"Eugene? I think we need to talk about…" Rapunzel did not see Eugene. In the sitting room, a fire was roaring. Their two plush arm chairs were empty in the flicking flame light. She looked around; Eugene was nowhere to be seen. Rapunzel checked their private dining room, the bedroom, the bathroom, even both the closets. Eugene wasn't anywhere.

"Is he looking for me?" Rapunzel went back to the fire and the arm chairs. She trailed her hand along the round table that sat between the two pieces of furniture. On it sat a book and a bouquet of flowers.

Rapunzel's cheeks suddenly flared crimson. Her eyes glazed over with rage. She grabbed the flowers off the table and threw them into the fire. As she watched them burn, Rapunzel's heart washed over with grief. She collapsed in a chair and began to cry. She covered her face, hiccupping with confusion.

Rapunzel did not notice the envelope with her name on it that had fallen on the floor.


	8. Chapter 8

Scene Eight: Sloshed

Gerald actually wasn't that surprised that Eugene knew of a seedy place like the Snuggly Duckling. What surprised him, was how friendly and jolly the regulars could be.

Rapunzel's ruffians were a singing mass of men; and Eugene was right in the middle of them.

When the two friends entered the Snuggly Duckling, Eugene ordered a drink right away. He downed it in one shot. Gerald and Hook stared at him.

"Uh…something wrong, Eugene," asked Gerald. Eugene shook his head.

"Why would it be?" He ordered another drink and drank it a bit more slowly. Only three gulps. He ordered a third.

"Eugene, are you sure you're okay," Hook asked.

"I'm ffffine, okay,' snapped Eugene, his speech already beginning to slur. He took a draft. "Something just happened today that pissed me off, alright? I'm drinking it off. Perfectly natural." Eugene's voice shook with anger. Gerald and Hook decided not to touch it. But they needn't bother. After a few more drinks (more like a lot more), EVERYONE knew what the problem was.

"I'm 'er 'usband, damn it! She schood spen' 'ore time wif me, ri? I meeeen, ish, dat too mush to ashk for?" Eugene was sitting at the bar, his arms hunched on it, with his head down. He dragged a finger through a pool of beer, looking like he was going to cry. He suddenly jerked up and pounded his fist on the counter. "I deserve to be apprishiated by 'er! I do shit for 'er mos 'usbands wouldn't even think 'bout doing. You know what I mean, boyzzz?" Some of the men just nodded, amusing the drunk. Vladimir, Hook, and Big Nose were all by Gerald.

"Should we take him home at this point," Big asked.

"Why? It's sort of funny," said Vlad, grinning.

"But Rapunzel has got to be worried about, right," voiced Hook. "I mean, is she really not paying any attention to him?"

"I have no idea," Gerald shrugged. "Rapunzel has been pretty busy, but they have mornings and evenings together. Though, personally, I think this is good for Eugene. He doesn't get to have tantrums at the palace." The assembled men nodded their heads.

"Yeah, gotta keep up appearences." The men watched as Eugene sloppily drank another mug of spirits. He slammed it on the counter. A man bumped into him. Eugene rounded on the man. He took him by the collar and looked like his was going to punch him. Suddenly, his eyes filled with tears as he pleaded his case.

"I don' understand why she won look at me anymore. Schometimes, I don't think sheee loves me at all." He started to bawl into the guy's shirt and blew his nose into it. The man looked disdainfully at him.

"Okay, question time," Gerald said. "How many of you actually want Eugene to remember this tomorrow?" Every hand went in the air. "Okay. How many of you think he actually will remember this tomorrow?" Every hand went down. "Nice to know to know Eugene has such caring friends." The men chortled and watched as Eugene got up on the table with yet another mug of beer.

"You all wanna know 'ow we two met? She 'it me over te head wif a frying pan. 'Ow mush 'an she love me if she did dat? Seriously." He held the mug close to his face, like it was a stuffed animal he was hugging. "But, she was so preeetty with dat pan and da sun shining on 'er gold 'air. Why did I eva cut it?" Eugene gasped. He knelt down to someone's face, wide eyed. "Maybe dat's why she 'ates me now…I didn't make 'er 'air long enough. Dat's gotta be it. I'm a terrible 'usband!" Eugene began to bawl his eyes out again as he took a drink.

"What the hell is he talking about," asked Big, gesturing to Eugene. The other three shrugged.

"Maybe it's time we cut him off," said Hook. "He is making a fool of himself." He moved to get Eugene down from the table. Eugene noticed him and pointed at him.

"Hooky! Play dat song we all know we like!"

"What?"

"Dat catchy one ya'll sssang wif Rapunzel. Come on, we all know the words!" Eugene pointed at Hook again. He began to sing, loud and off key. "You're malishioush meen 'an scary. Your schneer could curdle dairy. And violence wise, you 'ands are not the cleanisht, but despite your evil looks and your temper and your hook, you finally became a concert pianisht! Everybody! I've got a dream! I've got a dream!" Hook turned back to others.

"Actually, let's see how this plays out." Gerald put his hand up, thoroughly confused.

"Why does everyone know this song?"

"Long story there. We'll tell it later. For now, let's just enjoy this." The four men looked up at Eugene. Three were grinning, whishing there was some way to capture the moment, but Gerald was beginning to think he really should take Eugene home. He'd seemed to have gotten his angst out of his system and now he was just compensating for attention. He also felt it was his duty to keep the husband of the kingdom's princess free from embarrassment.

"Aaaaaand Valdimir collects scheramic unicorns," Eugene sang, cracking every note. "Now itsch my part!" Eugene cleared his throat. "I had an old dream, no really! Not very touchy-feely. Then I met a girl who got me killed! Now, I'm living in a palace and I'm treated awfully callous! Just like a story that's gone wrong, my new dream died!" Eugene then began to twirl in a circle on the table, splashing booze on the men egging him on.

"That's alcohol abuse where I come from," Vlad said sadly.

The table kiltered and suddenly cracked under Eugene's weight. He crashed to the floor. The four stood to see if he was alright. Eugene popped up.

"I'm good!" He looked in his mug. "Aw, man, I'm out." Eugene wandered over to the bar to get more beer for himself. Gerald snatched the mug from his hand.

"Okay, I think that's quite enough drinking."

"Aw, come on, man, I'm not even drunk," Eugene practically yelled at Gerald. He was very loud.

"How many Vlads do you see?"

"Five!"

"Yeah, I'm taking you home." Gerald went to grab Eugene by the arm, but he ducked out of his reach. He walked up to Vlad.

"Hey, Vlads, I betcha tweny gold coins, that 'oo ca'n tossh me throoo a window, an' I'll be fine."

"Deal."

"And now we are really going." Gerald snatched Eugene by his leather vest and dragged him out of the Snuggly Duckling.

"W-wait-te par'y isht jus' star'ing!"

"Nope. You're going home to your wife."

"Aw, fuck…my wife. You know, man, I think I'm drunk. Rapunzel's gonna be pisshed about that."


	9. Chapter 9

Scene Nine: Not Tonight

Rapunzel yawned as her eyes strained to stay focused on a book. It wasn't that the book was incredibly dull (it actually sort of was), but it was so late. Her reason for staying up was so that she could talk with her husband. She did not want to go to bed without talking to Eugene. If she didn't, she felt the issue might never get resolved.

It was so late. Rapunzel wondered where Eugene could have gone. It wasn't like him to be out for most the night. Evenings were always his favorite because he could spend them with her. But did he even want to be with her anymore? Rapunzel chased the thought from her mind.

Rapunzel stoked the fire and looked back at the door. It wasn't locked and she was expecting Eugene to walk in at any minute. She was so tired, she wondered if she could even have a conversation with him about that afternoon. Rapunzel frowned and returned to the page. She had to find her place again, not that she was really reading it, she just didn't want to read the same passage for a sixth time.

The book began to slip from Rapunzel's hands. Her head began to nod. Her eyes drooped. She could always talk to Eugene tomorrow…

_KNOCK. KNOCK. KNOCK._

Rapunzel jumped at the raping on the door. She stood up, certain it was someone coming to tell her Eugene had been found injured or dead or covered in women and he was being put to death by her father!

She flung open the door.

It was Gerald, with a flushed and wobbly Eugene hanging off his arm.

"Ank oo, sir, I 'an 'ake it from'er." Eugene tried to stand up straight, but he almost collapsed with the effort. Rapunzel put her hands up to catch him, but Gerald had a pretty good hold on him.

"Easy, Eugene. Don't go and overdo it." Gerald addressed Rapunzel. "Good night, Princess. I believe this delinquent belongs to you." Rapunzel was baffled. She wasn't sure if she should laugh at Eugene (he did look pretty funny; he had a stupid grin on his face) or yell at him.

"Uh, yes, I guess he does belong to me." Rapunzel put her arms out, ready to take her property. Just then, Eugene finally righted himself. He clapped Gerald on the shoulder.

"Gerald, yoor a goo man, ooh know 'at? I'm uhnna name mah firsht bor son af'er oo. I 'eem it!" He grinned at the guard. Gerald put a hand on Eugene's.

"You do that, buddy."

Eugene's eyes widened and his hand flew over his mouth. He ran past Rapunzel and ducked in the bathroom. He slammed the door shut and the two heard him retch. Rapunzel stared at the closed door. She turned slowly back to Gerald, her hands on her hips.

"What happened," she asked calmly and quietly. Gerald knew she was fuming. He shrugged and gestured to the bathroom door, where Eugene up-chucked again.

"Your husband got dunk."

"I can see that," Rapunzel said angrily. "But what happened." Gerald let out a sigh.

"Pardon my answer, Princess, but I think you need to ask your husband that." Gerald bowed and walked off down the hall.

Rapunzel was speechless. She blinked a few times at Gerald's retort and slowly closed the door.

She heard Eugene throw up his insides again. She winced, feeling the urge herself. Who on earth let him get so drunk? She walked over to the door and knocked.

"Eugene? Are you alright."

"No…" he moaned. Rapunzel opened the door, to find Eugene's head in the toilet. "You'll be happy to know," he said with his voice echoing in the bowl, "that this toilet was clean." Rapunzel couldn't help but smile. He always said silly things to lighten the mood. Another wave hit him and his body shuddered to get rid of the night's poison. Rapunzel had to cover her own mouth to keep her late dinner down. Eugene panted into the toilet, his shoulders shaking. He clutched the sides for support. He threw up one more time and flopped back onto the wall, the nasty bought finally over with. Rapunzel knelt beside him and looked at his face.

He was an awful green and sweat poured from his temples and forehead. He had barf around his mouth and his eyes were blurry with tears. Rapunzel got up and wetted a rag. She cleaned his face and wiped his hands off. She noticed he tried not to meet her eyes. Rapunzel put the rag on the counter sink and began to unclip his soiled vest. It looked like he didn't quite make it to the toilet in time. She took the vest off and unbuttoned his shirt. She slid that off his shoulders too. She then helped him stand up. He almost put all his weight on her, but got half of it into his legs. Rapunzel led Eugene to the bed and he almost fell face first on to it. He laid down, moaning as he did so. Rapunzel tugged at his boots and then pulled the sheets down to cover him.

She did have to feel sorry for him, no matter how mad she was at him. She'd never seen Eugene so drunk and she wondered if he'd ever been. Just as she was pulling the blankets up to his chest, Eugene whispered for Rapunzel to come closer. She leaned in.

"I ever tell you, you got a great ass?"

Rapunzel had half a mind to slap her husband. She angrily dropped the covers where they were and stalked over to the couch, taking a blanket and a pillow with her. She sat down and settled in. She tried to will herself to sleep, but instead, tears fell. It was only after she had cried a great deal, did Rapunzel doze off into an uneasy sleep.


	10. Chapter 10

Scene Ten: Scolded

Eugene did not want to open his eyes. They hurt. So did his teeth and tongue and throat and in a general form of speaking, his mouth tasted like up chucked yak's milk mixed with rutabaga juice. His ears hurt too, like someone had blared a trumpet in them for five hours straight, but mostly, his head hurt and his stomach wasn't too whoopee either. He groaned and rolled over, realizing to himself he hadn't changed into his pajamas. He wondered who took his shirt and boots off. What the hell did he do last night? He remembered heading to the Snuggly Ducking with Gerald and he remembered his first few drinks, but…. He fumbled through the sheets for his wife.

"Rrrpunzel?" he moaned. No answer. "Rapunzel?" he said louder. His lifted his head, at the expense of a sudden wave of nausea, and cracked an eye open. He glanced around, but saw no one. "Rapunzel? Pascal? Anybody?"

"I'm here." Eugene just about jumped out of his skin as he physically jumped at the voice and promptly fell out of bed.

"Ow…," he moaned on the floor. He really wished he hadn't moved; now the room was spinning even worse and it was taking everything in him to keep everything in him down. "Who said that," hoping he really would get an answer and not some hung over hallucination.

"Your mother-in-law." Eugene righted himself to his knees and glanced over the edge of the mattress. There was Queen Isabelle, sitting in Rapunzel's favorite reading chair, sipping a cup of tea. "Rapunzel's not here. Neither is Pascal. She's actually asked me to look after you today."

"Hm, I see she couldn't be bothered to do it herself," Eugene mumbled as he pulled himself back into bed, only to bury his head in pillows. The queen said nothing to Eugene right away. Instead she moved herself to sit down by him on the bed. She gently put a hand on his back and rubbed his shoulder blades in a motherly fashion.

"How bad do you feel," she asked him sympathetically.

"Like Max punched me in the gut," he said in a dead pan, muffled voice. The queen chuckled a little

"I don't think horses can punch someone."

"You've obviously haven't spent enough time with that horse." He moved a pillow away from his head, but did not look at the queen. He rubbed his hand over his face as he moaned. "Oh, I think the last time I got this drunk, I woke up naked and tied to a bed. And the bed was in the middle of a lake." The queen said nothing, but she tried not to burst into laughter. She found that to be an amusing situation. "Is Rapunzel in an all important meeting or something," Eugene asked.

"No. Truthfully, she actually didn't want to deal with you today. At least that's what she told me, her words, not mine. She said she wants the both of you to be calm enough to talk."

"I'm hung over, I think I'm pretty calm."

"Well, I know from personal experience that being hung over does keep one from wanting to yell too loudly." Eugene looked at his mother-in-law dubiously.

"You've been hung over before." The queen scoffed.

"Eugene, please, just because I'm a queen doesn't mean I haven't drunk too many schnapps before. Actually, I can still drink some of the guards under the table." Eugene cracked a smile, then his eyebrows snapped down.

"Wait…you said yelling…how do you know…?"

"About yours and Rapunzel's fight? I sort of overheard it. I was actually rather shocked to hear you yell at Rapunzel." Eugene groaned and threw a pillow over his head again.

"I'm such an idiot. I wish I'd never said all that to Rapunzel."

"Well, Eugene, I understand where you coming from, but you could have said it with more tact." Eugene whimpered pathetically. Isabelle rubbed his shoulders again. "Eugene, you and Rapunzel will have been married a whole year in another few months and I don't think it's a good thing that you spent a whole night out drinking and that Rapunzel has decided to avoid you. Rapunzel wants to talk with you, but you'll need to be able to talk to her too." With that, the queen stood up and walked over to the door. "I have things to do, but I'll be back to check on you later." The queen opened the door and left.

Eugene lifted his head out of his pile of pillows. He ran his fingers through his hair.

"Fuck…I'm in deep shit?"


	11. Chapter 11

Scene Eleven: Let Me Tell You a Story…

Queen Isabelle closed the door and looked at her daughter. She was standing against the wall, her hands behind her back, eyes on the floor.

"Are you sure you don't want to see him right now?" Rapunzel shook her head. The queen sighed. What was she going to do with these two? "Well," Rapunzel's mother continued, "I have the morning and afternoon off, would you like to spend your day with me?" Rapunzel nodded her head. She pushed herself away from the wall and slipped her hand into her mother's. Isabelle put her head on her daughter's and led her to her own private rooms.

There, Rapunzel sat down in the plushest chair and pulled a pillow into her lap. The queen put her hands on her hips.

"Rapunzel, you are not going to mope all day, are you? Eugene got drunk; every normal husband does from time to time."

"That's not it," Rapunzel mumbled.

"Well, what is it?" Rapunzel looked like she didn't want to answer.

"Eugene and I had a fight yesterday. I think he's mad at me because…because I don't spend enough time with him or pay enough attention to him, or something like that. I don't really know; I didn't understand him. But I can't help it if I get busy, I'm the princess."

"He actually has a point, dear, about you being able to order more free time." Rapunzel's jaw dropped; she looked absolutely mortified.

"You said you didn't hear anything."

"I heard enough." The queen smiled and sat down next to her daughter. "You two shouldn't let your first fight get in the way of your feelings for each other. It's natural for a couple to fight every now and then."

"But Eugene and I _never_ fight."

"Well, that's a lot of bottled up frustration, isn't it?" Queen Isabelle let her words sink in. "You and Eugene really don't talk about each other's feelings when it comes to royal duties and protocols, do you?" Rapunzel said nothing. The queen sighed and looked at Rapunzel. "Let me tell you a story, Rapunzel. When your father and I were first married, I felt like Eugene. Everyone wanted to talk to my husband, never me. I was just the object that hung off his arm, the woman who was supposed to give him an heir. No one saw me as the queen yet or even the woman the king loved, and I didn't have a single friend in the palace. I absolutely hated all my ladies in waiting. I still knew a great deal more about palace behavior than Eugene, or even you knew when you two first came to live here, but I could not understand why my new husband, who had promised me his life, wasn't paying attention to me. I loved him and I knew he loved me, but he barely talked to me or even touched me. I tried to ignore it, thinking it was just how things were going to be for awhile. He was very busy; he still is…" Isabelle trailed off. "But after a few weeks of this, I could hardly take it. So, one day, I stormed into his office, which was full of ambassadors and basically told him to make love to me right then and there." Rapunzel's face grew hot. She tried to hide it with the pillow.

"Did he," she mumbled to her mother.

"Actually, yes." Queen Isabelle grinned triumphantly. "He canceled all of his meetings for that day and spent the rest of the day with me. It was actually the first time he'd been with me since our wedding night. But you see, at that time, your father was the King. Unlike you, he had a whole kingdom to run and he did have to sit me down and explain that to me. I suppose I already knew it, but it was frustrating to not be with the man I loved. And that's how Eugene feels. Now, with you and Eugene, you're only a princess and don't have as many duties, and some days, you could just say no. All this is partially my fault, I will admit, I do make your schedule's, but, as Eugene put it, you're a princess from crying out loud. Use the power you were born with and order some free time. I won't be offended." Rapunzel stared at her pillow. The fabric had been woven so that the image of flowers checkered it. Rapunzel sighed.

She could understand why Eugene would be mad at her about their limited time together; she was mad about it too. She missed him, missed him being with her, next to her, touching her… but she had seen him touching another woman.

"Actually," Rapunzel mumbled. "There's something else about Eugene."


	12. Chapter 12

Scene Twelve: I Remember This One Time…

Eugene had an old partner who was an incurable drunk and his cure for hangovers was a dish of gravy and radish juice. Well, that only sent Eugene hurling into the great porcelain god again. He just decided to sleep it off. He slept the whole morning and well into the afternoon. He woke up around three o'clock, groggy and hungry. Thankfully, a plate of food had been left for him. He ate it, not really noticing the flavor.

"This would taste better if Rapunzel was eating with me," he muttered solemnly. He hated not being able to see her. It was driving him crazy. He completely understood why she wasn't seeing him; he couldn't remember the night before at all and Eugene knew he could get stupid when he drinks. He must have done or said something to really steam her. Though, that probably wasn't the only reason. She must have been really upset with him about his 'tantrum' from yesterday too. Things didn't look good from him. He'd actually made Rapunzel mad, something she'd never been. He had just exploded on her without warning, like an over charged cannon. He wondered if there was even any hope for him.

"She still wants to talk to me," he told himself, "so, maybe I've got a chance." But he needed to actually talk to her before he knew for sure and that meant finding her. Still a little queasy, Eugene left their rooms to find his wife so he could apologize and maybe even save his marriage.

He had no idea where to look. He knew Rapunzel and he knew she wasn't going to hide anywhere he could find her. That was okay; Eugene could take a challenge. However, before he could start his search, a valet of the king found him.

"Eugene," said the man in a stuffy manner, "his majesty, King Nicolas, wishes to have a conference with you." Eugene suddenly remembered that his mother-in-law had overheard his and Rapunzel's argument. He gulped.

_Oh, shit._ She must have told him.

"Right now?" Eugene was surprised his voice didn't crack.

"Right now," the valet said sternly. Eugene willed himself to not to break out in a cold sweat as he was obliged to follow the man to his father-in-law

_I'm a dead man. I'm a dead man. I might as well jump out the window and take my chances with the ground. _ Eugene toyed with the notion at every window he passed.

In the span of an eternity and seconds, Eugene was before the doors of the king's office. Eugene was exceedingly proud of his nerves of steel, but nothing is scarier than your wife's father, without even being a king.

The valet knocked.

"Yes," said the king. The stuffy shirt opened the door. He stepped partially into the room.

"I've brought Eugene for you."

"Ah, yes, thank you. Send him in and that will be all." The valet seemed a little disappointed that he didn't get to stay. He stood to the side and held the door opened for Eugene. He bowed his head to the man and entered the room, expecting an arrow in his chest. He heard the valet close the door and Eugene was sure his fate was sealed.

"Don't stand on ceremony, son, sit down." King Nicolas gestured to a chair across from his desk. Eugene didn't look at it; he was looking at the long, cold sword that the king was sharpening, slowly and deliberately.

_Sheek. Sheek._ The metal on the whet stone rang his certain execution.

"Eugene? Won't you sit down?" _Sheek._

"Uh, yes." Eugene clumsily collapsed in a chair. He forced himself to smile.

"How are you today, Eugene?"

"Uh, well…"

"Because I heard you're hung over." _Sheek._ "Did you have fun last night?" The king smiled pleasantly. _Sheek._

"I honestly can't remember."

"Mm, hit the drinks a little hard, didn't we, son?" _Sheek._ "Now, why on earth would you go and do that?"

"Uh…"

"Oh, no need to answer. It's quite understandable to drain one's frustrations after a fight with one's wife." _Sheek._ "I hear that you and my precious, beloved, only daughter have been fighting." _Sheek._ Eugene said absolutely nothing. He actually didn't have a voice.

_He's gonna kill me. I'm dead. I'm dead where I sit. Rapunzel, I wish I could apologize to you._

"I also hear," _sheek_, "that you said some rather hurtful things to her." _Sheek. _"Raised your voice to her. Wished you hadn't married a princess, which means, you wished you'd never married her." _Sheek._ The king stood. He set the whet stone aside and tested the edge of his sword. Eugene tried to blend in to his chair.

_Oh, fuck. This is it. I don't want to meet my maker yet. I at least wanted to have one kid with Rapunzel. My love, please happily without me._ Eugene fought the urge to shut his eyes so he wouldn't see his end coming.

"Now, wishing to have never married anyone, that is an unforgivable sin." The king came from behind his desk and stood in front of Eugene. He weighted the sword in his hand. "It is most unfortunate, most unfortunate indeed."

_I wish…_

"But, not every couple is perfect," the king laughed off.

_The fuck?_ Eugene watched with a mix of relief and disbelief as the king walked over to the mantle above the fire place and set the sword on a stand.

"Exquisite blade, isn't it? It's my ceremony sword, never had to use it once. I sharpen it when I'm bored."

_I'm glad that's all you do with it when you're bored._ Eugene rubbed his neck, glad to feel it under his fingers.

The king admired the blade for a few more seconds. He went back to his desk and sat down. "Even happily married couples fight, Eugene," the king said, nodding. "Naturally, you feel bad about it, anyone would. I have to admit, I've turned to a drink or two when Isabelle and I have had a disagreement. Oh, yes, we've fought before." The king smiled. "I remember this one time, it was actually at the beginning of our marriage. My wife, now, there was handful. She was the daughter of a duke and we'd met at a formal affair. She came in place of her father. Anyway, I courted her and we became betrothed, but for some reason, she was not taught the proper protocol of the palace life. I'm sure you can relate."

"Oh, yes. I'm still adjusting."

"Yes, I've noticed, (Eugene frowned). Anyway, we weren't even able to go on our honey moon right away. I was in the middle of figuring out a new trade route with five other countries and Isabelle was feeling neglected. Perfectly understandable, but she wasn't telling me this. She actually kept her distance from me. I realize now, she was respecting my duties, but at the time, I thought she resented me. She was barely talking to me and still addressed me as your highness or majesty. I suppose I should have spoken with her, but I was new to marriage too. Then, one day, just as the ambassadors and I were finishing up the plans, Isabelle bangs the doors open and shouts, 'Bedroom. Now!' Then she stormed out. I of course, had to go."

"Of course." Eugene tried to cover his face with his hand to hide his blushing cheeks. He could actually see his mother-in-law doing that. He could also see Rapunzel doing that. He'd like it if Rapunzel did that. The king sighed.

"Ah, such memories of youth. Now, Eugene, I'm sure you've been trying since the fight to make up with Rapunzel, and I'm probably keeping you from that."

"Oh, not really. Rapunzel's avoiding me today."

"Hm, silent treatment. I wondered if she learned that from her mother." Eugene chuckled.

"I wouldn't be surprised if she did."

"What's that supposed to mean," the king asked sternly.

"Nothing!" The king grinned.

"Yeah, you're right, I wouldn't be surprised either. But the situation with you and Rapunzel, I'm not saying you're right and I'm not saying she's right, but the two of you need to have understanding about what's expected from each other."

"Yeah, I know that, and-"

"Shut up when I'm talking to you."

"Yes, sir."

"I know it's hard, considering you married a princess. Nothing in this palace is familiar to you at all and things are not simple, but you two won't be able to be together forever. Don't ruin the time you have together fighting over silly things and then not talk about it. Make the most of the life you two have made together." Eugene sighed. The king was right.

"Thank you, your majesty, for your wisdom. Now, I think I'll go and put it to good use."

"I think I'll tag along, just to make sure you do."

**Mm...will things be resolved? Look out for the last chapter.**


	13. Chapter 13

**_Oh, my gosh, thank you to everyone who was patient with me! I'm still alive to those who might be wondering; i was just really, pretty extremely busy, but here is the final chapter of_**** An Awful Tangled Mess. ****_Enjoy!_**

Scene Thirteen: Kiss and Make Up

The king walked a step behind Eugene down the hall. A few feet ahead up the hall, the queen held her daughter's hand as she led her back her rooms. The four had not planned to meet right at the door of Rapunzel's and Eugene's room door, but they did. And they were silent.

When Rapunzel saw Eugene, she gasped. Eugene heard and looked at her. His face drooped, like he'd been hurt. He opened his mouth and then closed it. Rapunzel tried to say something, but her voice squeaked. She looked at the floor, twisting the fabric of her dress in her fingers. Eugene shuffled his feet and put his hands in his pockets. They both looked at each other at the same time.

"I'm sorry, Rapunzel."

"I'm sorry, Eugene."

They both stopped to let the other speak. They couldn't help but crack a faint smile and chuckle. The princess and her husband did not notice the king and queen walk away arm in arm. Their work was done.

Eugene gestured to their closed door.

"Shall we go inside and talk?"

"I think we probably should," Rapunzel said quietly. Eugene opened the door for her. She walked in and heard him close it. She sat down on the couch. Eugene sat across from her. He put his arms on his knees, his hands going together immediately. He looked like he was trying to decide where to start.

"Well, I already said I'm sorry, but I'm sorry, about yelling at you and anything else I did or said. I shouldn't have. I understand your…position and I need to learn to respect that."

"Thank you, but, you had every right to get mad. Just because I'm a princess doesn't mean I should shirk off my duties as a wife." The two grew silent and blushed a bit.

"I didn't mean what I said, about wishing I'd never married a princess. I love you, Rapunzel. What I really meant was that, I wish we didn't have to deal with all the duties and protocol."

"Oh, I wish that too. I hate meetings. I like things that involve the villagers, but royal stuff…it's just tiring."

"Yeah," Eugene agreed.

"And I didn't mean what I said, about your nose. It's not…that hard to draw."

"You make it sound like it sort of still is," Eugene smiled.

"Well, just a little bit, but I like that it's difficult to draw." Rapunzel paused. "It makes me look at you longer." Eugene practically beamed at Rapunzel. He got up from his seat and sat down next to his wife. He took her hand and kissed it. She looked at their hands as he put them down. She still remembered Eugene with the other woman. She took her hand out of his and crossed her arms. Eugene looked at her, confused. "Eugene, I do consider our time together precious, I do. If I could, I'd spend every minute of my time with you. But, Eugene, I'm not sure I can trust you with your time when you're not with me."

"What?" Eugene cocked his head at her, his brows knit tight together. Rapunzel looked at him coldly.

"I saw you with another woman." Rapunzel tried to keep her voice even. Eugene's eyes rolled up as he tried to recall when he was with someone.

"I don't know what you're talking about, Rapunzel," he said, shaking his head.

"Oh, sure." Rapunzel got up and began to pace the room. "I'm sure you could easily forget about that woman. I'm sure there are plenty of gorgeous women who just throw themselves on you and say 'I love you.' And I bet you go around handing flowers out to everyone too." Realization dawned on Eugene's face.

"Oooooh."

"Oh? Oh? That's, that's all you have to say. Oh."

"Rapunzel, what you saw, it's, it's not what you think it is." Eugene was smiling, trying to keep himself from laughing.

"Oh, I'm sure it's not."

"You know, you're sexy when you're jealous."

"Don't flatter your way out of this," Rapunzel snapped. Eugene put his hands up to show he was backing off. "Who was she and why were you two all over each other? Well?" Eugene shook his head, his smile cracking wider. He was having a very, very hard time not outright guffawing.

"Okay, Rapunzel. Just, sit down first, okay?" She sat on the edge of the bed. "I sort of meant by me, but fine. Rapunzel, that girl-"

"That was _not_ a girl."

"Fine, that woman, she's friend of mine."

"Mm-hm."

"No, Rapunzel, a friend from when I was a kid." Eugene's voice changed. His face slackened. Eugene hardly ever mentioned anything from his past. Rapunzel looked at him, finally willing to listen. "Yeah. She and I were like, I don't know, brother and sister at the orphanage where I grew up. She works here. She actually started when you and I came here. You can't imagine my surprise when I saw her after so long." Rapunzel didn't say anything. Eugene continued. "Anyway, I caught her yesterday heading to meet her sweetheart. He works at the palace too, in the stables as a groomer. I was asking her how their relationship was going and she was saying they were engaged. I put the flower in her hair so she would look nice. I said congratulations and she hugged me. That's it. Okay? You can ask her, she'll confirm everything and-"

"No, Eugene. I believe you." Rapunzel talked into her lap. She lifted her head a bit, still focusing on her hands. "But you made the smolder at her." She looked squarely at Eugene. "That's _my_ face." Eugene blinked, then grinned.

"Yeah, it is, but, that face is how I got out of trouble as a kid. It was a joke between the two of us. I asked her if she used it to get the guy to ask her to marry him. She said she used more sophisticated ways of seduction."

"The smolder is totally sophisticated," Rapunzel said. "That woman doesn't know what she's talking about." Eugene laughed.

"That's what I told her!" As an afterthought, "I knew there was a reason why I married you."

"You mean you never had a reason before?"

"Oh, sure, lots, but I couldn't narrow it down to one. Now I have one; you like my smolder."

"Ah, such high standards." The couple chuckled. From across the room, the two looked back at each other. Their faces softened when their gazes connected.

"Does this mean you forgive me? Because, I forgive you, even though you didn't do anything. I just figured you'd probably think you did something and you'd want to hear that."

"Yes, Eugene, I forgive you. And You're right, I didn't do anything, that's why we had a fight." Rapunzel groaned and flopped back on the bed, covering her face. "And, I am such an idiot! I got mad over absolutely nothing!"

"Well, it must not have looked like nothing, my friend and I, I mean. I know if I saw you with some guy I'd probably…" Eugene stopped. "Actually, you don't want know what I'd do." Rapunzel chuckled and sat up. She looked across the way at Eugene.

"By the way, Eugene, do you by chance remember anything from last night?"

"I'm glad and ashamed to say no. I know I got hammered and I do…stuff when I get hammered." Eugene trailed off, biting his lip as he remembered old drunken bouts.

"Well, you said I have a great ass." Eugene considered his drunken words.

"You do." Rapunzel laughed.

"Oh, really? Is it your favorite feature about me?"

"Oh, no, no." Eugene walked over to her and sat down next to Rapunzel on the bed. He put an arm around her. "I don't have a favorite feature, because I love all of you." Eugene kissed the crown of her head. Rapunzel sank into his embrace.

"I'm sorry," Rapunzel whispered into Eugene's chest.

"I'm sorry more," Eugene whispered into her hair.

"I'm sorry most."

"I'm sorry times infinity."

"Eugene!" He laughed as Rapunzel playfully shoved him. He fell back on the bed and pulled Rapunzel with him. She collapsed on top of him, splayed out like a rag doll. She mumbled an apology, but when she tried to get off of him, Eugene put his hands on her back and held her there. He slid his hands down her back and all the way to her bottom. He squeezed it. She sat up with a yelp. Eugene grinned slyly at her.

"See, great ass. Do you still want that make up sex now?" he asked her.

"Is it still make up sex if we've just made up?" Eugene chuckled and Rapunzel felt it all down her body.

"It can be whatever you want." Eugene lifted his head and kissed Rapunzel. He brought her head down with both hands. Rapunzel propped herself up a bit, just so that she wouldn't crush Eugene's chest. He kept one hand on her neck, holding her to his kisses. His other hand came up to her back. He let his fingers find her lacing. He slowly, teasingly pulled them loose.

_He seems a little eager today, he usually kisses me more,_ Rapunzel thought. Well two could play at that game. Still propping herself up, she shifted her weight to one hand and started to unclip his vest with her now free hand. (This was actually something Rapunzel was very proud of, being able to undress Eugene with one hand) She thought smugly of herself when she finished unclipping his vest and Eugene was still on her lacing.

Eugene broke their kisses.

"There's no need to rush, Blondie. I think your parents gave us the rest of the day off." Eugene pushed himself up and stood, slipping his arms under Rapunzel. He put his forehead to hers, his eyes as large as a puppy's.

"You know I'm sorry," he started, "but, just for today, will you let me have my way with you? I promise it will be good for you too." Rapunzel put an arm around his neck, angling his head so his mouth was closer to hers.

"I think I should, since I've been such a horrible wife," she teased. She kissed him, nipping his lips a little. He nipped back.

He sat her down on the bed, leaving her sitting up. She cocked her head at him.

"I think I want you to take my pants off," he said, winking at her. Rapunzel didn't complain. She stood up, locking her eyes with his. She no longer needed to look at her hands. She didn't break her gaze as she undid his belt. She unbuttoned them and let them fall around Eugene's ankles. Somehow, he still looked dignified.

Eugene slipped his vest off. He crossed his arms and indicated for Rapunzel to take her dress off. She rolled her eyes and bent down to pull up from the bottom. As usual, she got stuck.

"Eugene!" He tried to keep from laughing as he dodged her flailing arms. He pulled the dress off to reveal a Rapunzel with static hair. He smirked at her and patted the hair down, remembering the day he'd cut it. It really wasn't ever going to be long again.

"Rapunzel," he said, "do you hate me for cutting your hair so short?" She blinked at him. He really wanted an answer.

"No."

"Really?"

"Really, I don't." Rapunzel put her arms around his neck. "I was angry right after you cut it, but only because I thought I couldn't…wouldn't be able to save you… But, no, Eugene, I do not hate you for cutting my hair short. Sure, I miss being able to hang from it, but everyone has to give up something, right?" Eugene smiled.

"Right." He embraced Rapunzel and eased the two of them back onto the bed. He nibbled on her ear and moved down her neck. She thought he would move to her lips, but he instead started down her chest, but stopped at her shift. He stared at it problematically. With a decision on his face and a shrug, Eugene ripped the whole of the shift open, exposing Rapunzel. Instinctively, she covered herself up.

"Eugene!" He growled at her.

"You said I could have my way with you."

"But I didn't say you could destroy my clothes!"

"But I've always wanted to do that." Rapunzel scowled at him, but it was forced; she did have to admit, unwilling, it was _fucking hot_ to have her clothes literally torn off of her, but still, how was she going to explain the damage to the seamstresses? No use worrying about it now.

Eugene pulled the destroyed undergarment from under Rapunzel and threw it to the floor. Rapunzel saw him glance down at her panties.

"You'd better not rip those off," she warned.

"I had a different idea." Eugene lowered his head and Rapunzel's mouth dropped as she watched Eugene. He took the top of her panties in his teeth and tugged at them. He lifted her legs up and only let go of the underpants when they were too high up. He finished removing them with his hands and tossed those aside too.

"What about you?" Rapunzel asked, pointing to his shirt and his own underpants. It was Eugene's turn to roll his eyes. He crossed his arms and pulled his own shirt off with more grace than Rapunzel had with her dress. He removed his last article of clothing with the same sort of fluid movement.

It never took a lot for him to get horny, Rapunzel thought.

Rapunzel laid completely still, complying for Eugene's request.

"You don't have to act like you're dreading it," Eugene said, a little crestfallen. "I said it would be good for you too."

"Well, I don't know what you want me to do."

"Hm, true." Eugene sat back and thought.

"I could give you a back massage," Rapunzel suggested.

"What?" Eugene's head popped up at the idea. Rapunzel got on her knees and put her hands on Eugene's neck.

"I must have put you under a lot of stress of late. Let me work the tension out." Before Eugene could agree, Rapunzel let him go, and forced him down on his stomach.

"You know, you won't get rid of the stress if you throw me around."

"Oh, be quiet and let me work." Eugene chuckled and put his hands under his chin. Rapunzel's heart beat fast at the sight of seeing Eugene's shoulder blades move under his taut skin. She'd never seen him move from the _backside_ before. He actually had a pretty good ass too.

Rapunzel kneeled over her husband and put her hands on his shoulders. She started to work the muscles loose. Eugene started to groan almost immediately.

"Am I hurting you?"

"No…." he moaned. "Just the opposite." He sure didn't sound like he wasn't in pain, but he didn't complain.

She mostly worked at his shoulders, but she teased him by running fingers down his spin. He really was tense. Rapunzel felt guilty for that. Her hands got tired fast, but Rapunzel was willing to do anything to make Eugene feel better. She worked the knots loose, amazed by how hard they were. She found one spot, right where his neck met his shoulders that was particularly tough.

"Geez, it's like a rock." Eugene only moaned an indifferent shrug. He was too engrossed in the back rub.

Rapunzel stopped. She sat back on his bottom. It took Eugene a second to realize that is wife had ceased rubbing his back. He twisted to look at her. Her arms were crossed.

"I'm putting you to sleep, aren't I?"

"No…." Rapunzel didn't believe his answer. "Maybe." Eugene groaned and sat up, angling his body to the right so that Rapunzel would fall in the middle of the bed. He knelt over her. "I suppose it would be problematic if I fell asleep, wouldn't it?"

"Only slightly," Rapunzel smiled. Eugene smiled back. He moved over her, adding kisses to his fluid movement. He kept wandering from her mouth, wanting her neck and eyes at the same time. Rapunzel put her hands on his face to keep him place. She felt him smile through a kiss.

He brought a hand up to her breast. Rapunzel's heart leapt at the touch. With his face so close to hers, she saw none of his other movements. He tweaked a nipple, twisting it between his fingers. Rapunzel 'awed' into his mouth. He moved his hand down her stomach when her nipple became hard.

Rapunzel released his face and he traced its roughness over her body. She shuddered. He came up to nuzzle her neck. She ran her fingers through his hair, letting a leg twist with his.

Eugene put a hand on that leg and moved that scoured hand over her soft skin. He placed his other hand on her other leg. Eugene played dangerously close to Rapunzel's center. But he was teasing her. Rapunzel sighed in irritation. Eugene smirked.

"Sorry princess, it's my rules today."

Rapunzel was about to say something snappy back when Eugene wrapped his arms over her thighs and pulled her up to him. His erection came close to her, but Eugene bent down, hiding it. He actually bent down very low. He brought her hips up higher and his face disappeared between her legs.

She felt his tongue slip inside her.

Rapunzel's body convulsed at the sudden shock. She'd never felt anything like it. Only his fingers or his member ever touched her there. But his tongue; he moved it wildly, pressing against her walls. She watched through tearing eyes as he brought a hand up. He pressed a thumb to her clit and her stomach tensed. Her head grew hot and fuzzy. Eugene had never stimulated her in this manner before. She clawed at the sheets, mewling for more. She wanted it deep.

"Please," she whispered hoarsely. But Eugene didn't comply. He continued his feast of her, pleasing her for now with his tongue and thumb.

The truth was actually that he couldn't stand it for much longer either. He and Rapunzel had not been together in weeks and he was long overdue. He tired to satisfy himself as he caressed Rapunzel with his other hand; stroking himself, but nothing was better than his wife. Again, Rapunzel pleaded. But Eugene was still wanting to tease.

He moved his head away from her, setting her back on the bed. He inserted two fingers, enjoying Rapunzel's face as her voice caught.

"Please what?" he asked, moving his hand slowly.

"Eugene…"

"Eugene what?"

"You… fucker."

_Where did she learn that word?_ Eugene thought, finding himself a bit pleasantly surprised at her vulgarity.

"What is it that you want, princess?" His voice was so low and grating. It was becoming hard for him to hide his own desire.

"You…inside…"

"Inside what?" Oh, Rapunzel was going to get him back somehow for this.

"Inside me, you idiot." She looked up at him. "That's where you've put it before."

Eugene had to stifle a laugh. He scissor opened his fingers in her and twisted them. Rapunzel writhed a little under him.

"Do it already." Her eyes were closed and her voice was small. Eugene bent down to her ear.

"As you wish it, princess." He nibbled at her lobe as he tortuously pulled his fingers out in an unhurried manner.

Rapunzel opened her eyes to watch her husband position himself over her. He noticed her looking at him. He grinned crookedly. Without entering her, he came up her to face and placed a hand over her eyes.

"Eugene, what ar…" She stopped mid word. She felt his erection against her. He was still teasing her. Was this her punishment for neglecting him for so long? Well, if it was, it was working. Rapunzel was going mad with the growing desire Eugene kept building up inside of her. But she knew he wouldn't be able to hold out much longer himself, and she was right.

Eugene penetrated her, pressing in as deep as he could. Since she had not seen his movements, Rapunzel was unprepared. She let out a loud cry and almost whimpered. Eugene finally removed his hand. But it was not support himself or to caress Rapunzel's face. No. He wrapped a hand over each leg and to Rapunzel's confusion, flipped her over onto her stomach, all the while maintaining contact.

Rapunzel said nothing. She had seen positions like thins in books before. She'd always been a little apprehensive about trying it out though.

Eugene paused in his movements, to see if Rapunzel would protest in anyway, but when she said nothing, he continued. Again, putting his hands her thighs, Eugene spread her legs as far as they would go and raised her hips up too. He bent over her on his knees, leaning down to nip at her ear before he spoke.

"The rule still stands."

The rule. If it hurts, let him know.

Rapunzel nodded her head. Eugene went back up and began to swing his hips.

_Ah, he's pounding on my core,_ Rapunzel thought. She dug her face into the sheets, Eugene's movements rattling her spine all the way to her brain. He filled her up much more deeply in this position and the sensation left her with no words. All Rapunzel could manage were high sounds of pleasure. She panted hard. She held on, wanting the moment to last much longer.

Rapunzel squeezed herself around Eugene and she was rewarded with a deep thrust. Eugene brought a hand up to where he was working and began to massage her clit again.

_No, you'll make me come._ Rapunzel bit her lip, the ecstasy starting to rip through her. She held on she; knew she could.

Eugene kissed her between her shoulder blades, making sure to brush his beard against her spine. He enjoyed her tremble mixed with a shallow breath. He stroked her harder, moving quicker and deeper. Rapunzel wasn't sure how much deeper he could go or how much more she could take of this.

It wasn't for much longer. Rapunzel washed over Eugene. Her hips drooped and Eugene had to catch her. He kissed her again on the back and swiftly turned her back around, never breaking his movements. He knew he could get her to orgasm again and he stared his movements again, faster than before.

Rapunzel found her voice again and knew to call her husband's name. He was everywhere on her: lips, eyes, neck, ears, breasts, torso. Rapunzel could not keep track of him as her mind fogged up again. Her stomach twitched as another shock of ecstasy came over her and again and again.

Eugene was close. His breath was ragged and he was drenched in sweat. His grunts were strained. He held out, for her, wanting her to come one more time for him. Her voice was now many octaves high and Eugene's name could not have sounded sweeter. Rapunzel reached her final climax and went limp. Eugene was spent too. He discharged his desire into Rapunzel and held himself there, letting his final heat seep into her. He removed himself slowly and laid down next to his wife. Rapunzel's eyes were closed, but she was smiling.

"Make up sex is fun," she rasped out in breathy giggles. Eugene kissed her above the ear.

"You think so? What about the classic sex?"

"Classic?"

"Love-making." Rapunzel sat up.

"Is that a request for later?" she asked.

"Maybe, but right now," Eugene slipped an arm under her and pulled her to his chest, "I don't want to let you go."

Rapunzel listened to Eugene's heart; it reminded her of an excited child. Rapunzel loved the sound of Eugene's heart.

"I don't want you to let me go." Eugene's chest vibrated with a chuckle.

"Then I guess we are at a mutual position."

It was the middle of the day, but the couple began to drift off to a well deserved sleep. And as Rapunzel listened to Eugene's breathing as it steadied, she knew that things were all right between them now. And if they ever had another fight, they always had make-up sex. But Eugene was right; love-making was better.

_**Well, there you go. I hope you enjoyed it.**_


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